open to new experiences

Every yoga class is a different experience not only for students but also for me. Not only the students progress in every yoga class but also I learn new things. Particularly when I am practicing with groups to which I feel close and with which I have a good communication, I do not think about what comes the next but the class flows. What is important is our interaction.

It was such a class when I asked the students what they wanted to do that day. The students said they felt so tired that day and wanted a calm class in which they could stretch their bodies. I had always liked calm classes however that day I wanted something active and I did not know how I could handle a slow and calm class.

When the students were on all-fours in “marjaryasana-bitilasana” (cat-cow stretch), something came into my mind. We should work “pelvic tilt” that day. “Pelvic tilt” was the exercise in which we moved the pelvis front and back. In an exhale, we were tilting the pelvis posteriorly and in an inhale we were tilting the pelvis anteriorly. If we assume that we have a tail, we were hiding our tail in-between our legs and pushing the “iliac bones” forward when we exhale and showing off the tail at the back of our hips and pushing the “iliac bones” backward when we inhale.

We tried “pelvic tilt” in “tadasana” (mountain pose), “ardha uttanasana” (standing half forward bend), “adho mukha svanasana” (downward facing dog), “padangusthasana” (big toe pose) and on our back. All these “asana”s (poses) were added in-between “vinyasa”s (flow). During the flow, not only hamstring and gastrochnemius muscles stretched but also the back muscles and core muscles strengthened. After strengthening core muscles with “pelvic tilt”, we worked out “mula bandha” (root lock).

All these preparatory poses should be followed by a peak pose. We would stand in “ardha sirsasana” (half headstand) and do push-ups only with our legs, extending the legs to the ceiling in each inhale and descending them to the level of the abdomen in each exhale. Those who thought they could not do this pose would do the same thing in “salamba sarvangasana” (shoulderstand).

That day, we realized one thing. We were not aware of the power within ourselves. Even though we think that we engage our core muscles and pelvic floor muscles, we were not using them effectively. We thought that we were efficiently engaging these muscles, however we were so weakly engaging them. If we could use our inner power in the real sense, there was nothing that we could not do. Everybody was saying the same thing at the end of class: “I was thinking that I was using my pelvic floor muscles, however I was not. I just realized what it means to engage the pelvic floor muscles together with core muscles. Everything will be different from now on. I will be open to new experiences by using all my inner power”

yin and yang

I have been focusing on core strengthening flows and inversions in my yoga classes for a long time. I do not know why but if it is summer and if it is hot, almost all students want to focus on flow classes and get the most benefit from that class. We forget to stretch our bodies in those times. And when we start stretching our bodies, the body reminds us for how long time it has been neglected.

 

Last week was the week of fall equinox, So we focused on “surya namaskara” (sun salutation) flows and core strengthening flow classes in last week’s yoga classes. One of the groups told me that they wanted to stretch their bodies. However, they did not want to stay long in “asana”s (poses) as “yin yoga” style but wanted a dynamic stretching instead.

Following opening meditation, we sat in cross-legged position and laterally stretched the spine. After bending the spine forward, we got on all-fours for “marjaryasana-bitilasana” (cat-cow strtech) and relieved the spine with a twist.

As the students wanted dynamic stretching, we got into “adho mukha svanasana” (downward facing dog) after the twist on all-fours. In this pose, we stretched calf muscles and then we bent the knees and straightened them in order to extend “hamstring” muscles.

Throughout the class, we mostly did standing poses like “lateral stretching” in “tadasana” (mountain pose), “uttanasana” (standing forward bend), “parsvakonasana” (side angle pose), “ashwa sanchalanasana” (high lunge), “anjaneyasana” (low lunge), “eka pada raja kapotasana” (pigeon pose), “square”, “gomukhasana” (cow face pose) and did the arm position of “garudasana” (eagle) pose when sitting in gomukhasana. After “upavistha konasana” (seated angle pose) we ended the class with a twist and “savasana” (deep relaxation and resting pose).

As we would not wait long in poses that day, I started to do the flow together with the students. We closed the eyes and felt the warming up of the spine. Then we got into downward facing dog and realized how tense our hamstring and calf muscles were. When dynamically stretching the body, we flew from one pose to another with the help of our breath and as if we were dancing. No interruption between the poses, and a class like a dancing class.

In the poses, I tried to find out for how long we had been focusing on flow classes. Of course we are strengthening the bodies with flow classes but what about the flexibility of the body? We were stretching our mind and thoughts when we stretched our bodies, weren’t we? How tense we got without even realizing. I saw that I was having difficulties in poses which I used to do so easily and it was so hard to wait for even a few breaths in these poses. My body got strongther ok, but it also needed a good stretch. I had forgotten the yin-yang cycle. I decided to always remember the yin-yang cycle in my daily life and my yoga classes, starting from that moment. Life was not just full of excitement, heavy flows and entertainment but it was also full of calm times and the times we turned inward. I once more thank my students for reminding me this very important motto and I bend with respect in front of them. Namas’te.

to stand up after falling down

Why do we afraid of in our lives? If we are a kid, we are not afraid of anything. Falling down and getting up is not a problem for us if we are a kid. If we are a grown-up, we are afraid of falling down. At least most of the grown-up. And this fear of falling down is a big obstacle before us in our yoga classes when we experience inversions.

I wanted to teach inversions in one of my private group yoga classes last week. Even though I had been teaching this group for a few months, we had refrained from trying inversions. When I say, “let’s try inversions today”, the group always says in return “why don’t we try core strengtheners” or “why don’t we stretch our upper back or chest.” However, I had made up my mind before I went to class that day. We would try inversions that day and our peak pose would be “salamba sirsasana” (supported headstand).

Following opening meditation, we warmed up the bodies with “surya namaskara” (sun salutation) series. To strengthen arms and shoulder girdle, we did “phalakasana” (plank pose), “chaturanga dandasana” (low plank), “ardha salamba sirsasana” (dolphin pose) and forearm plank pose. We strengthened the core with “utkatasana” (chair), “viparita karani” (legs up to 90 degrees), “marjaryasana-bitilasana” (cat-cow stretch) and “navasana” (boat pose) variations.

It was time for the peak pose. I showed two variations of the headstand: “Salamba sirsasana” and “tripod sirsasana” (tripod headstand). Some may ask if it is wise to show alternatives to students. Some students were afraid to hurt their neck when trying sirsasana on the top of their head. Why were they thinking so? I do not know. Unfortunately we can no way know the reason of our fear. If we knew, we would confront them. Therefore, I showed tripod headstand as an alternative and wanted them to feel safer on not only their heads but also on their arms. Some students asked me to stand by their side and help them try the pose in the middle of the class, not by the wall. Some of the students said they would feel safer by the wall and tried the pose there. At the end of the class, students said they were afraid of headstand and they wanted to try the same pose in the upcoming few classes.

We tried headstand again in our next class after warming up the bodies. The second trial was much more better than the first one. The students who stood by the wall tried to lean on the wall and lift their legs up by themselves. When they did it, they were astonished at how they did the pose, triggered their fear and caused stress. When they got stressed, their adrenalin was triggered and they were under the influence of sympathetic nervous system. In fact in yoga classes, we wanted to keep the mind as calm as we could even though in the most difficult poses instead of the “fight or flight” mode. When the students felt that they were doing the headstand, they wanted to run away from the pose with the fear they were feeling. The only thing we should do was to try the pose often, confront our fear and start doing the pose as if it was the easiest pose we had ever done. This could be achieved only by controling the mind and calming down the nervous system. What was important was to keep the mind calm. Even though we are just sitting in a meditative pose or we were doing a headstand or a handstand, our aim should be keeping the mind calm and keep body, mind and breath in full harmony. Thus, we could stand up even though we fell down. As how children are not afraid of falling down and we – the grown-up – teach the fear of falling down to children, we — the grown-up – would not be afraid of falling “just like children” by trying it again and again and learn to stand up when we fall down.

moving with the flow

When I was writing about summer that had not come to my hometown yet, summer has come at once. Of course, I am so happy. I love hot weather and the sun and I never complain. However, hot weather has started to affect yoga classes. Even though the students go on showing up in classes, they feel themselves so tired due to hot weather. And they want to practice something that would make themselves feel well.

As this week was June 21, the summer solstice wek, I practiced just “surya namaskara” (sun salutation) in my classes. As the classes last only one hour, we limited ourselves with 54 sun salutations instead of 108. Before the classes began, I told students that we would practice 54 sun salutations. The students were so exited and said they were not sure they would complete the entire flow. And I told them, “we have been working for a long time and I know how strong you are. Don’t worry I am sure you can do it. We will rest in every five sets.” And the flows began.

“Surya namaskara” series accompanied by music. We practiced sun salutations comprised of “phalakasana” (plank) and “ashtangasana” (knee-chest-chin) in the fist 20 sets. This way, I wanted to show the students that they could manage to complete all sets and to warm their bodies. After 20 sets, we did four of the five sets with “phalakasana-ashtangasana” and the fifth as “surya namaskara A” which included “chaturanga dandasana” (low plank). In the meantime, I was practicing with them to support them. When we came to the 30th set, I added “surya namaskara B” to the series. We practiced the first three of the five with “phalakasana-ashtangasana”, the fourth with “chaturanga dandasana” and the fifth as “surya namaskara B.” And thus, we activated the element fire during our one-hour sun salutation practice and tried to reduce the exhaustion.

When I went to one of my evening classes, there were fewer students in the class. I guessed hot weather also affected us. I had something in my mind but I saw that students were really exhausted, so I asked them what type of a class they wanted. They wanted to work slowly and it would be good to stretch their bodies that evening. After the opening meditation, we stretched the spine and groins with “butterfly” and then came on all-fours for “marjaryasana-bitilasana” (cat-cow stretch). After warming up the spine with cat-cow stretch, we stretched the chest with “melting heart.” We stretched the groins, inner thighs and hip flexor muscles with “dragon” pose. At that moment, I decided to go on with partner yoga, had some fun and stretch the bodies more.

The students were facing each other in “parsvakonasana” (side angle pose) and extended their arms towards each other to help stretch each other. The other partner yoga poses were “phalakasana”, “adho mukha svanasana” (downward facing dog), “vrksasana” (tree), “utthita hasta padangusthasana B” (hand to toe pose B). One student was in “balasana” (child pose) and the other laid down on him to open the chest up. One student was in “paschimottanasana” (sitting forward bend) and the other again opened up the chest on him. Then “navasana” (boat pose) and “upavistha konasana” (wide-angle seated forward bend) in pairs. One laid down supine and the other was flying high on his feet. Finally spine stretch with “cat tail”. Then came “savasana” (deep relaxation and resting pose).

When I went to class that day, I had a plan in mind but when I saw the students so exhausted that they could not practice what I was planning, I changed my plans and decided to stretch their bodies. When we were twisting in “dragon” pose, I decided to go on with pair yoga. And how the class began and how it ended. Sometimes plans were of no use. It was possible to change ourselves and adapt ourselves to the new flow. What was important was to stay in the flow, feel what the flow was bringing and to move with the flow instead of resisting it.

doesn’t happening, then let go

We all want some things to happen in our lives. We all struggle to achieve some things. We all push things hard to get some thing in our lives. Not only in our daily lives and professional lives but also in our emotional lives and in any physical activity including yoga, we all try to get some things done. Sometimes we are so obsessed with “that thing” that we cannot even think of any other thing and guess what “that thing” is so away from us.

When I went to my private yoga class last week, I decided to teach a “yin” (female energy) yoga class due to the mood of the student. She said that she had issues to settle and maybe she needed to let some things go and wanted a class that could be good for her. And I decided to teach a “yin” yoga class and asked her to watch what would come out.
We began with a long meditation. We started to warm up the spine with “marjaryasana-bitilasana” (cat-cow stretch). When moving with breath between two “asana”s (poses), I asked her to close her eyes and watch her breath moving her spine. Instead of moving her body consciously in each asana, I asked her to see how her breath moved her body. “Let the body open to the outside world in each inhale and turn inward in each exhale. In which pose do you feel more comfortable? Is it better to open to outside world or to turn inward? How do you feel in these two poses today?”

After warming up the spine, I wanted to see what would come out of “dragon” pose when we focused on inner thighs and groins. We began. It would be useful to make one thing clear. The student was on paid leave and she had not practiced yoga for a month. Naturally her body was reacting to the first yoga class in a month. “Dragon” was a challenging pose both physically and emotionally. So she could not stay long in this pose and got out of it. If the body tells you to “get out of the pose because it cannot endure any more”, we should listen to it.
Resting in “balasana” (child pose), we would stretch hip flexor muscles with “half saddle.” I thought that it would be good for the student to try “dhanurasana” (bow pose) after stretching hip flexors and the chest. In the right side of “half saddle”, the student thought that she could not endure any more and she got out of the pose. In the other side, we began to talk.

As the student had the opportunity to ship books abroad, I had asked her if we could ship two yoga books. She told me it would not be a problem so we asked for the books. Neither of the books came but a DVD came instead. The student was so angry with the post office and told me that she felt so sorry and she did not know what to do.
“No problem. Maybe it would not be good for me if I got those books. Maybe those books were no use for me. Maybe that DVD would be so useful to me. Really no problem” The student, “teacher, I feel so bad and so sorry. I made a promise to you and I told you that we could get your books but something different came.” Me, “if something does not happen, it is really for a reason. There is no need to force.” The student, “how come if it does not happen, it is for a reason. I cannot manage to do that. I cannot let go. I cannot accept. I think I should learn this. If we have made up our minds and decided something, that will happen. I cannot just walk away.”

And I started to tell her about something that happened to me recently. Something in my daily life and something not philosophical. There was something I wanted to buy and it was on sale. It was a good sale and I decided to buy it. I gave my credit card. However, the salesperson could not get the price from the credit card. That day, something was wrong with their lines and the system was not working. And I had not enough cash money one me. They tried again, but failure again. So when it could not be done in the second trial, I asked them not to try again and give back my credit card. Can a salesperson give up? No, of course not. She tried again. And no success. I told her that it was not a problem, maybe I should not buy that because it was not good and useful for me. The salesperson insisted: “If you are in this mall, come again in an hour.” No, whatever she told me would be no use. Even if she gave it as a present, no. Why would I force it? Maybe it would be no good to me, maybe I would be allergic and it would give harm to me. If it doesn’t go well and happen, no need to force.

I would meet one of my friends however we could not make a plan and adjust our schedules. “Let us not meet for a while. Maybe we should not see each other for some time. Maybe we would have a fight or argue if we meet. Maybe the flow keeps us away from us and prevents it.” Maybe everything happens for a reason. If it doesn’t happen, no problem.

Maybe all these may seem you like “giving up.” No, it is not giving up. It is following the marks and trying to see what the signs are showing us and acting accordingly. Not to force life, to move with the flow in real sense and to really be together with the flow. If it doesn’t happen, it doesn’t happen. No problem. This simple. Not only in our daily lives and emotional lives but also in our physical activities, yoga and meditation. Everywhere… “Everything happens for a reason.” Maybe the thing we are so desperate about will be bad for us and therefore it does not happen. So, do not force. Let go if it doesn’t happen. Just try to look at from this perspective and try. What will you lose?

to complete each other…

I focused on strengthening and stretching back muscles in my private and group classes last week. I don’t know why. I think many people complain about back problems in today’s world. Or maybe long hours in front of computers led me teach such a class. Or maybe I might have thought that we could have a more erect and right posture if we strengthened our back muscles. Whatever the reason was, my classes focused on back muscles last week.

I had no specific intention when I started the class. During the opening meditation, I told the class that my intention was to strengthen and stretch back muscles and to become healthier and I added, “if you like, you can set yourself another intention and observe if you reach your goal at the end of the class.” Let’s see what this class would be like. Generally I set an intention and a theme before the class and I keep up with this theme during the flow. I really wondered how the class would end that day. Let’s see.
We began the class by stretching the spine. “Utthita balasana” (extended child pose), “marjaryasana-bitilasana” (cat-cow stretch), balance in table pose, “thread the needle” twist and “uttana shishosana” (extended puppy pose) were the asanas we did on the floor for the spine and the back.
After warming up the body, we stood up with “adho mukha svanasana” (downward facing dog). Following a vinyasa flow, all the class was in front of the mat standing in “tadasana” (moutain pose). We warmed the bodies up with “surya namaskara” (sun salutation) flows. Now we could intensify more on the back muscles.
In order to strengthen the back muscles, we practiced “ardha uttanasana” (half standing forward bend) — sometimes our hands on the floor or on knees sometimes our arms straight in front of our bodies in the shoulder level, “virabhadrasana I” (warrior I), “virabhadrasana II” (warrior II), “virabhadrasana III” (warrior III), “parsvakonasana” (side angle pose), “parivrtta parsvakonasana” (revolved side angle pose), “trikonasana” (triangle), “parivrtta trikonasana” (revolved triangle), “garudasana” (eagle), “ardha salamba sirsasana” (dolphin pose) and plank pose on elbows… Flowing from dolphin pose to plank pose on elbows, and getting back into dolphin pose from plank pose on elbows for a few times and then staying in dolphin pose… At that point, I told the class, “those who want can try ‘pincha mayurasana’ (feathered peacock pose).”
New students did not understand what I was talking about. Students who had been joining my classes for about a year did not want to try that pose because I asked them to try the pose in the middle of the class not by the wall. Only one of the students jumped on her elbows but gave up without fully doing the pose.
I decided to add some back strengthening asanas on the ground to our flow before the class ended. Trying to sit straight in “dandasana” (staff pose), flowing into “navasana” (boat pose) and trying to keep the back and spine straight. “Ardha bhekasana” (half frog), “salambhasana” (locust) variations and “ustrasana” (camel) were some of the other back strengthening asanas. When trying the camel pose, I reminded “axial extension.” What was “axial extension”? It was the simultaneous reduction of both the primary and secondary curves of the spine. In other words, the cervical (neck), thoracic (upper back) and lumbar (lower back) curves were all reduced and the result was that the overall length of the spine was increased.
I had to explain this in detail: “When inhaling, feel that your body is extended from the pelvis to the top of your head. The spine is extended, extended and extended and now that you are short of breath and you can no more extend your body, bend backward. Backbending is not just throwing your head and shoulders back. First you need to extend your spine, then you need to roll your shoulders back and bend backward from your chest. Do not just throw your head backward (I was showing at the same time). Do not just throw your shoulders back (I was showing at the same time). Feel as if there is a rope in your chest and that rope is pulling you up. When there is no more room for you to be pulled up, roll your shoulders back and open your chest to the ceiling. If you reach this point, you can leave your head backward. Support your waist with your hands.”
I asked the class to support their waist with their hands in the first trial. In the second trial, I asked them to reach their heels if they could. I observed the class again and realized that they were lowering their legs to the back. I asked them to watch me again and showed again. “When you are going backward, your legs should not come backward with you. Your legs would continue to stay at 90 degrees. You may push your hips and legs a little bit forward so that they won’t come back while you are leaning back.” And everybody tried again. I looked at all the participants one by one and was glad to see that everybody did “ustrasana” just as how it had to be done.
The class was about to end and I decided to focus on a few inversions in order to reverse the energy. The energy in the body was flowing from the top to the ground all day. I planned to flow the energy to the brain by inverting the bodies. “Salamba sarvangasana” (supported shoulderstand), “halasana” (plow pose), “karnapidasana” (ear pressure pose) and “mtasyasana” (fish) poses came one after the other. Everybody in his/her own pace… Staying in each asana for three, five or more breaths… Doing one or two or all of the asanas, depending on how they felt… Totally free… Just meeting the needs of their bodies and souls… The only condition was to practice “matsyasana” in the end in order to balance the body.
We calmed down the bodies and nervous system with “twisted roots” before “savasana” (deep relaxation and resting pose). Then came a long relaxation period and closing meditation, hands in front of the heart in “anjali mudra” (prayer pose).
Not in the group class but in the private class, something happened at that point. I had not set any intention before the class but some words came out of my mind unintentionally at the end of the class: “We practiced yoga to strengthen and stretch the back. Our intention was to become healthier. I mean this was my own intention and goal for this class. At the beginning of the class, I did not have any philosophical intention but at the end of the class, I want to share how I feel right now. Strengthening or stretching the back is not a unilateral thing. We need to stretch and strengthen the chest in order to stretch and strengthen the back. That is, nothing can happen on its own in life. Everything depends on each other. We cannot bend backward and stretch the back without stretching the chest and rolling the shoulders back. This means that everything or everybody in life need others. Nothing can exist alone.” I had planned just a physical class but the class once more turned into a philosophical one. Who knows? Maybe physical, spiritual and philosophical could not exist without the other… They were completing each other…

what has happened to my throat chakra?

It was years ago… I was at a yoga class. We were performing the simplest asana. “As you inhale, tilt your tailbone and pelvis up and let the spine curve downward, dropping the stomach low and lift your heead up. As you exhale, tilt the pelvis down, drawing the spine up and pulling the chest and stomach in.” Has these sentences meant something to you? Yes, it is cat and cow stretch. In Sanskrit, marjaryasana-bitilasana… In anatomic sense, pelvic tilt… Do you wonder why I have handled this topic. It is such a simple pose that what’s the point of writing a post about it? The reason? So simple. A neck moving between the two asanas, and emotions, things we can express, things we cannot express, toxins and so on in our neck.
A yoga class usually starts with a meditative sitting pose. The instructor tells about the intention of the class and prepares students for the class. After a short opening meditation, the class generally starts with a cat-cow stretch. Why? Because this asana is one of the most fundamental poses that wakes the body up, revives it and moves the spine. Therefore, it is possible to see cat-cow stretch in almost all yoga classes. This asana stretches the body, starting from the tailbone to the top of the head, strengthens and stretches the spine and neck, stretches the abdomen and back, helps detoxify the body, massages internal organs, helps correct our posture and prepares students to the class.
These are only the physical benefits of the asana. Doesn’t this asana have spiritual and emotional benefits? I have to respond positively to this question as a person who has  experienced them herself.
Have you ever thought what kind of spiritual and emotional benefits cat-cow stretch can have? Or have you done this pose just to do it in classes? In simple words, this asana calms down the mind. It helps us find our emotional balance and reduces tension.
However, these are not the benefits I am talking about. Let me tell about my own story.
When I first started you, cat-cow stretch was one of the main asanas I was facing in classes. This flow was not a physical problem for me. It was easy. Anatomically, my body was suitable for “pelvic tilt.” I could flow from cat to cow and from cow to cat with a fairly deep angle. So what was the problem?
The problem was the movement of the neck in cat-cow flow. In cat pose our head was turning downward and in cow pose we were looking at the ceiling, i.e. the neck was in continuous movement. This was a challenge for me. Don’t misunderstand me. I did not have any neck issues. Everything was emotional. In the marjaryasana-bitilasana flow, I was in coughing and I could not stop it. I had a sour throat, I was leaving the pose and drinking a lot of water.
I can hear you ask “so what?” This asana is a unique pose to solve the physical problems in the neck and throat. Mine was totally emotional. I could not say what I had in mind to the people around me in order not to make them sad or sorry. I could not express my thoughts easily. I could not utter what I have in mind. My mind was saying one thing, maybe my heart was thinking the same. But unfortunately, I could not utter them. In this case, coughing in cat-cow stretch was a natural reaction.
My throat needed to be purified. Everything that came into my mind but could not be expressed from my lips was toxifying my throat. I needed to detoxify my throat. However, it was not so easy. I was a person who was repressing everything so far in order not to make anybody sorry or sad. I was not telling anything, I was keeping everything in my mouth and mind, and my throat was toxified. My throat chakra, i.e. “vishudda” chakra, was blocked.

Let me tell about this chakra in brief. “Vishudda” is a chakra related with self-expression. As I could not express myself, my throat chakra was blocked. Also, this chakra is related with creativity, communication and thruth.
As I was not expressing my thoughts not to hurt anybody, everything that stay in my body was affecting my throat and blocking my throat chakra. Coughing was a natural result of this blockage, particularly in cat-cow flow. This was not all. I was suffering from throat problems like laryngitis and phrangitis as every emotion or thought I could not express were blocking my neck and throat.
Moreover, I was having some communication problems since I could not express myself. In order not to hurt anybody, I was hurting myself and I did not want to see my friends and relatives because I did not have anything to tell them. I was not talking but instead I was keeping everything in my mind and body.
Also, there was the creativity dimension. I was neither a Picasso nor a Beethoven but I used to sing from time to time. I used to sing when doing housework or when driving. I was suffering from pharingitis or larengitis most of the time, I had a sour throat. How could I sing? I used to play the guitar. I was not playing it for a long period of time. I used to write but I was not writing for years. I left everything I liked to do. You cannot expect a person who cannot express himself or herself to be creative, can you? So, creativity was gone.
And I coughed, coughed and coughed in every cat-cat stretch until there was nothing more to cough, clean and detoxify. Then I saw that I could express my thought but not hurting anybody. By making it softer, by not hurting anybody.
What happened after I started to express my thoughts? I could not explain all of them but first of all, I was emotionally relieved and I was peaceful. I was important. I wrote a post about being important too, it was about “ahimsa” (non-violence) principle in yoga philosopy. You should apply it to yourself first. First you care about yourself whether you are harmed by anything around you. First protect yourself, then your environment.
After expressing my thoughts and emotions, I started to overcome my communication problems. Nobody was aware of what I was going through and I started to tell everything in mind. Do not misunderstand what I am saying. I was not talking bluntly. I was sane and expressing myself clearly. My communication problems were being solved. When expression and communication problems were resolved, it was time to re-gain our creativity. I started to sing, of course on my own. I was shouting, singing when I was driving. Playing an instrument. I have not started yet but I am planning to. What about writing? What am I doing now? Can you say that I have solved my “vishudda” (throat) chakra problems?